letters to God

i have suddenly fallen in love with the art of letter writing again. there is something about a handwritten note that comes in the mail that is just so amazing. i’m not sure what part of it i love the most, the fact that someone thought of me and took time to write or that the mailman realizes i’m a big deal in someone’s life because they sent me a letter.

i remember in middle school - before email, instant messaging, and texts were all the rage – a close friend and i would write notes back and forth several times throughout the day. we would draw cute little borders and pictures that would make each other laugh on the edges and fill the page with lots of thoughts that were meant only for the other to see. now, just eight short years later it’s about the communications that are much more convenient than letters. emails, texts, and instant messages are the new way to let someone know you care in a much simpler, quicker way. you can type them, there’s no charge to send, and they arrive within seconds. however, these digital communications don’t have the beautiful scrawl of your loved ones or the scribbled out mess-ups of a younger sibling. a handwritten note is the diamond of written communication.

now, a journal has never been the thing for me. i have no desire to write to a book about my days. but there is something so cathartic about writing a letter to God every once in a while to let Him know your heart and to create a little reminder to you about the big moments in your faith. i never liked feeling like i had to write every day… or every other day (something my mom is soooo good at!), but instead have found it helpful to my faith to look at my notebook and realize there are bimonthly letters to God. some are sad and pleading for His help, others are reminders to myself about my lacking in some area while strong in others, and still more talk about my loved ones. but the one thing that’s the same in all of them, i’m speaking, very honestly, with my God.

“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” –Philippians 4:8

what do you have to bring to God? it doesn’t have to be a letter like Paul wrote to Galatians with all kinds of biblical knowledge, but rather a note of honesty, of pure heart. show God you long to be thinking on the things of Him despite the fact that you haven’t in the past. you don’t have to worry about impressing God with everything that you know about His word… why? because compared to Him you know nothing!

“Boast no more so very proudly,

Do not let arrogance come out of your mouth;

For the Lord is a God of knowledge,

And with Him actions are weighed. -1 Samuel 2:3

God speaks about the vastness of His own knowledge throughout the bible, but in 1 Samuel 2:3 he lays it out straight, “the Lord is a God of knowledge”. boom. we get it…. or do we?

my favorite passage to look at in my notes talks about the amazing faith of the people in my life – the immeasurable strength of my father’s, the curiosity and longing of my mother’s, the ever worshipping faith of my brother’s, the child’s faith of my baby brother’s, the new, yet intellectual faith of my boyfriend’s – and then i refer to my faith… i say to God it’s dried up and hungry, but I’m letting it stay that way, God. i don’t feel like i even have the energy to fix it. God read those words too, and He fixed it. He took the cup of life and filled my little heart until i sought out His word like a traveler in the desert seeking water.

verbal or silent mental prayer is much like email. it is soooo much more efficient and easier to use than writing things out. but when you handwrite a letter to God, when you put your thoughts and words on paper, you create a permanent record of your prayers rather than a fleeting thought. use a letter to God to renew your communications with Him. write your prayer out on a paper and keep it somewhere safe. then, in a couple months, look back and enjoy the answers to those written prayers.

song of the day:

you give me hope - between the trees

this song is on the movie letters to God soundtrack. it reminds me that He is here to give hope and i need to be keeping my eyes open and concentrated on all of the little rays of hope shining down from Him above. rays that could so easily be missed but are sent specifically me by my Father in heaven who loves me most.

the singer says, "you give me hope in spite of everything. you show me love even with so much pain. so i'll take this life and live like i was given another try." amen. He gives us hope. He love us. so, we will take our lives and live like He has given us another try.

yummy in my tummy

i have been watching my weight and what i eat lots lately. i have become very conscientious about how much i eat and how much i work out... but instead of learning a lot about myself and getting thin i have, once again, had my eyes refocused on my oh-so-good God.

i really love m&ms, chips and salsa, and iced tea with no sweetener. i mean i love them. if they could be a well-balanced meal i'd be such a happy girl. however, too many m&ms and too many chips with salsa make my tummy really upset. i have realized that it doesn't take much to go from just enough to too much and for a tummy ache to quickly set in.

in Phillipians 3:19, God warns against overindulgence:

"Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things."

the iced tea is, luckily, a healthy choice and i don't have problems with an upset stomach due to over-ingestion. God is much like iced tea. He is good for you, He has elements critical to life (like tea has water), He's just being Him and not trying to be too sweet (in other words, He's all natural and has no need for sugar coating).

but God is not like m&ms or chips and salsa. too much doesn't make you sick. He is not tempting you only to make you pay for quenching your desires. He longs for you to come and enjoy all of the flavor that He has to offer. God extends an invitation to believers in 1 Corinthians 10:31 in saying "So whether you eat or drink whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." amen, let's enjoy! His goodness will come upon us and bless us through our indulgence in Him.

enjoy the best of summer drinks and think of His greatness. He longs for us to drink of His greatness while spending time thinking on Him. i'm up for it.

song of the day:

the time is now by: phil wickham

it's summer, it's time for tea. yum. enjoy!

the sacredness of the nest

well, two weeks i fell off the face of the earth, but i'm back and i'm learning. sometimes i struggle because i feel like my thoughts are trivial and how in the world could i turn them into something that makes a difference for others... lately my blog has been getting a lot of hits and it makes me more conscious of the things that i'm putting out. if people are actually reading, i want to be speaking something worthwhile.

that said, bird's nests have always been of a major fascination to me. my mom loves them and has lots of artificial and real nests that she keeps around the house as precious decorations. but lately, a lesson from God has laid within the sweet little constructs.

a bird's nest is a very special little natural construct not just a bundle of sticks and reeds turned into a little home that serves a very special purpose. what is it that is so special about bird's nests?

1. you can't fake a nest.

when i was a young girl i really wanted there to be baby animals in my family (and there was no way that we were going to be puppies or kittens in our house), so i came up with a plan. my little brother (3 years younger than me) and i decided that we were going to build an artificial nest in the front yard of our home. we took our time perfecting the shape of the nest and gather together the perfect materials that even a bird would pick. no eggs and no birds found our little nest that sit so perfectly in the lawn for them.

just in this same way, you can't fake the plans or dreams, the place in life that God has for you. as much as it might not be exactly what you want or the plans you had made for yourself, God has them and His timing is ultimate.

"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain;

A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace."

-Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

just remember the little nest, remember that its built by the mama bird for a very special reason and if it's not made by her, it's not a place for her kids to be born.

2. nests are made with tender love and care.

a mother bird spends just as much time creating and forming the nest for her little birdies than she spends in the nest atop the eggs waiting to meet her sweet babies. and once they are born, it's a very short period of time that they stay in the sweet structure she made. we, as humans, have become obsessed with being as time efficient as possible rather than putting their heart into an effort that doesn't lead to a great reward, whether its self glory or material goods.

"Then he said to them, "Watch out!" Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." -Luke 12:15

we must remember to be mindful of what it is our efforts are truly doing for us rather than seeking a personal gain in all that we do.

3. creating a nest and hatching baby birds in it requires much patience.

sitting still and trusting there to be a wonderful end to your wait is a new extreme test of faith. i truly struggle being peaceful and waiting. i want things to happen and i want them to happen now. a mama bird, just sits and provides heat for her little unborn babies. she doesn't sit with others, she sits alone waiting for her babies to break from their little shells.

as God says in Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I am God". we must be still and wait for the little eggs God has sitting in our nest to hatch and fill our lives with His grand, unimaginable plan for us.

song of the day: Be Still My Soul

Kari Jobe

timmy timmy time

with graduation impending... well, in the next 9ish months, i have started to panic about what it is i am going to do with the rest of my life. in fact, i'm obsessed with thinking, planning, and worrying about what is to come with the end of my college looming in the near distance. i am not such why this is something i cannot seem to place in His hands since He has proved to have perfect timing in perfect plans for me, but i'm busy keeping it in my little palm.

my life, or at least one of the greatest parts of my testimony, speaks to the wonderful timing that God has for His believers. jeremiah chase, my precious littlest brother, is a blessing from God that came just when we needed him. and boy, oh boy, did we need him! but this story is just too glorifying to not be told!

in sixth grade i decided i really wanted a younger sister. oh man, did i want one. i prayed and prayed that God do what is best for our family but please, oh please, give me that little sister. a leader from church pointed me to jeremiah 29:11 and said, "amber, this is my favorite verse and i feel like it'll bless you as you pray for your younger sibling."

when getting back home i quickly looked up the verse and to my surprise it said:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11

well, He did have a plan. about six months later my parents sat my brother, scooter, and i down and let us know that we were going to begin the process of adoption. one year later, we were finally approved to have a child placed in our home. about three weeks later, we got the call. after a family vote we were on our way to the adoption agency to pick up sweet baby hallie. her and her mother had tested positive for cocaine at the time of her birth and she needed a safe place to stay. we just loved her and i was ecstatic that my little sister was here. God was perfect and He granted my prayer for a little sister. amen.

for three days we doted on her until it was time to have a visitation with her mom. a visitation that became a permanent stay from which she never returned. i was beside myself with devastation. i was livid with Him for taking away the little sister He should know that i deserve. my family really struggled to bounce back from the loss of Hallie. a family friend from church came over one afternoon and shared a bible verse with the family that she was sure would help was during our test of faith.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11

with a change of our agency and about eight months we were back on track. a month and a half later, another call came and the amazing baby jeremiah was placed in our home. from the moment that we met jeremiah in the lobby of the agency building to his sweet little self wiggling at my feet on the sofa this very second (i'm visiting home for the three day weekend!), he has been a light, a hope, a blessing.

a year and two months later we stood in front of a judge in the los angeles family courthouse, jeremiah became a minegar. what a lucky family we are! so my sister, though i wanted her so badly, didn't happen. but my amazing little brother did. amen. He is good and faithful in everything that He does. hallelujah.

the bible speaks of His amazing timing. it speaks of the great things He has planned for you, for me, and for all.

"He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end." -Ecclesiastes 3:11

that's right, He has set out eternity. our lives are already laid out ahead of us, we just must remember to long after glorifying Him. thank goodness He has it all figured out because i sure don't.

song of the day:

in God's time by:barry scott and second wind

perfectly imperfect

i’m back again! wahoooo! i have been doing so well, but it really honestly has nothing to do with myself and so much to do with God teaching me amazing lessons about His role in my life. for the first time ever in my dozen years of church going experience God pushed me last night. it was the weirdest experience, but the most effective God has ever been at speaking (ok, it was more like YELLING) into my heart.

i have struggled for as long as i can remember with perfectionism. this was something that was so loved by teachers and group mates in high school because i would put all i could into my work just to ensure it was perfect. but it wasn’t just at school. then i moved to college and i was tested beyond my wildest imagination and i realized that i couldn’t be perfect in school anymore, but i could be perfect outside school, so i became a neat freak and cleaned, organized, and labeled like it was going out of style (which it still hasn’t!). then i needed to move off campus and into an apartment and i found myself relocating my “home away from home” 3 times in four short months. i realized that being perfectly organized was a very difficult task with so much movement, so i transferred it to relationships. i longed to be the perfect daughter, friend, sister, girlfriend, classmate, employee, teammate, and the list goes on.

well, lately i have taken on almost all of those longings for perfection at once. but i have also retroactively applied this desire to a point where every action, word, thought, motive i can remember comes under scrutiny. if you hadn’t got the memo let me share, i’m not perfect. yep, i know, hard to believe. it’s tough for me too.

but that’s not it. of course, that’s not it. so yesterday i was driving to meet a partner for a project together and realized that i was putting too much pressure on myself to be mistake free, or perfect. i had a moment of realization that God is perfect and in His perfection i am allowed to be imperfect. not only am i allowed, i am imperfect.

so last night jason and i head into another service at our beloved church and i am ready to enjoy a night of worship and encouragement. but God had another plan for me. He spoke through paster matt and He screamed into my heart. He let me know that i am imperfect, broken, flawed, but He is perfect, proficient, restorative. my list of wrongs that i spent years beating myself up over was only bothering me. yep, you read that right, i, the wrongdoer, was the only one stewing, hurting, hating my wrong. the God who has every reason to condemn me for my lies, deceit, jealousy, gossip, hate, anger won’t. why?

because our sin, our mistakes, our shortcomings are really between us and Christ. like John describes in John 8, when the adulterous woman is brought before Jesus to be stoned,

"If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." – John 8:7

Christ is the only one without sin. He is also the only one with the ability to forgive what would easily be condemned by pain, by torture, by death. so, i need to forgive myself simply because Christ forgave me and He is the only one that can hold me accountable for my lengthy list of transgressions. what do you need to forgive yourself for? do you realize that Christ has forgiven you and wants for you to do the same for yourself?

not only did God show me that i needed to let all of these wrongs go. He showed me that by keeping a list, by keeping a record of wrongs, i am limiting my own ability to love myself. just like God says in 1 corinthians 13:4-8:

love is patient, love is kind. it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. it always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

no i don’t struggle with my weight or my athletic abilities (or inabilities) or my intelligence. i struggle loving my imperfections, my flaws, my mistakes. i have a great disdain for doing things the wrong way. well, news flash to me, i am imperfect. inherent in imperfection is doing things the wrong way, slipping up, getting a scuff when i fall down. but those imperfections need to make me who i am, not make me hate who i am. it’s time to let go and love.

song of the day:

everything glorious

by: the david crowder band

“you make everything glorious

and I am yours,

what does that make me?”

they capture every little lesson i’m trying to put out there in this song. and it sounds so much prettier than my big blob of text! J God bless everyone. i’m praying for you all. keep it up, He’s teaching us all something so cool.

and, lastly, email me about you if you’re reading. teach me what He’s teaching you.

synchronicitie@gmail.com

forgive them for they know not what they do

lately, i have been struggling with persecution. but not in the random mean people making rude comments sort of way. nope, it's someone that is supposed to be my "friend" that is testing my ability to withstand persecution.

for some reason my many years growing up in the church had always given me the impression that persecution had to come from outside your circle of friends. i somehow took the church bubble and included all of my friends, christian and not, as a part of the nice group. however, this friend of my just tests my ability to remain strong as a person of character. but i guess more details will allow for a greater lesson.

i have been assigned to a group project by one of my professors with four close friends. a precious girl from one of my classes was assigned to work with us and she decided to email me because she felt out of the loop. well, we just hit it off and ended up being in multiple classes together. i just really enjoy her and the fact that we have many things in common in such a short period of getting to know each other. none of my friends on the other hand have taken any interest in being cordial to her, much less befriending her. well, i am glad to have her as all mine since no one else has made an effort, and i'm really excited to say she is worshipping the same God that i am at the same congregation i attend!

in all of my excitement i shared the great news about my new friend to a couple of the other girls in the group. the same girls that took no initiative in reaching out to her. one in particular took it upon herself to let me know i'm weird and creepy in taking such an interest in a random girl in my classes. she has taken it upon herself to make sure i know how negatively she feels about my choices and actions at every opportunity and has even brought other friends into the mix by encouraging them to take on her rude ways. from verbal statements to facebook posts, it all is rude and hurtful.

while every part of me wants to shake her and say wake up you aren't that much cooler than me! i realize that there is no point in doing so. she believes that she is too cool to make an effort. she believes that anyone worth being friends with will pursue her. well, she is missing out. i am working on being proud of my friendliness and outgoing ways, while continuously being humbled by her rude words. jesus had some of the same issues during his time on earth.

we all know the stories of peter and judas. the ultimate traitors. they were in the jesus camp. they knew what he was up to, they knew he was the son of an almighty God, yet they betrayed him in the ultimate of ways. but more than just judas and peter, jesus was/is betrayed by us, the ones He came to save. he made the greatest of sacrifices, yet we daily persecute Him through our intentions, interactions, and all else.

but thankfully, jesus, while hanging upon the cross, begged for our pardon in saying,

"Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." -Luke 23:34

jesus was not just speaking about the group gathered around him at the time of his crucifixion. he is speaking to God the Father about us too. knowing that for centuries after his sacrifice man would continue to sin against Christ day in and day out. thankfully, he is not looking to give us what we deserve, but instead he desires to bring us into the heavenly kingdom with him and His Father.

so, in persecution, whether from inside your bubble of friends or not, be faithful to Him. or in the words of the greatest cliche, do what Jesus would do. think about it like jesus is asking you, "________ (insert name here), to forgive them for they know not what they do". wow, with a decree from Christ himself it is so much easier to keep a kind heart. just smile, it's hard to say mean things with a smile on your face. and remember He is watching from above and is proud of your obedience.

song of the day:

after your heart

by: phil wickham

learn the words and sing along. it makes you want to be more like Him. this is a desire that is so important to breed and song always makes it easier... :) and like Phil says, "lift your soul and sing with the choir... Hallelujah"

i'm headed home.

i'm going home tomorrow for the weekend! wahooo! this afternoon i was running and thinking about my blog and what to write next. and boom, home just made so much sense. why? well, let's get to it!

when i have been away from home for a significant amount of time (which is only three weeks) i get so antsy to head back to the sweet abode of my youth and my amazing family. then i got to thinking, is this what happens when we die? do we begin to think of the wonderful place that we are going to get to return to and our hearts fill with excitement? i sure hope so!

"My heart and my flesh may fail; but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." -Psalm 73:26

throughout the bible it is discussed that we will all die. that the heart and flesh will not serve our purposes forever and will grow faint and fail. the body serves as a temporary housing for the spirit that God created which makes us who we are. but without the confines of a body our spirits will have the chance to be free and fly with no physical constraints to drag us down.

so, how should we feel about death? i think He intends for us to be excited just like i am. i truly believe that God arranges a room for us in preparation for having us home. our job in this process, rejoice and be glad, you don't even know how great it's going to be!

"Rejoice and be glad for great is your reward in heaven, for so persecuted were the prophets which came before you." - Matthew 5:12

just imagine what this homecoming would be like. the angels will sing, family and friends to have come before you will gather with joy, and in the middle of it all that King of Kings will be there to give you a warm welcome home! gosh, death seems like a reward and no longer a loss. i believe this is how God meant for death and the ascension to heaven to be regarded.

why a blog like this? well, on days that are hard, when the world seems too much and everything is going all wrong, or after losing someone very precious to you, remember He is there with the greatest of plans and parties to welcome us home. there is a greater reward that waits for us outside of the world that is grander than anything that we could ever imagine.

song of the day:

i can only imagine - mercyme

i identify with the way they talk about entering into the pearly white gates of heaven. i wonder what i will do. when i go home now to see my family i honk and hoot and holler out the window hoping everyone is just waiting to see my little car out front. how will i react knowing God is waiting for me? oh my. i feel overwhelmed now and i'm only 21. i have lots of life ahead of me. but He is excited. and so am i.